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How do you make friends at 44?

This newest traumatic event to my husband's mom has really got me thinking. I am a loner of sorts. I like my "little life". Scott and I run our own business from home, we go out to dinner, go to movies and travel now and then. Its a good life. My husband is my best friend and that is a gift beyond measure. I love Susy, my sister in law. I wish she lived closer. She is one amazing woman.

Being thin and fit and able to handle more issues in life, has created strength I never knew I had. But there are some things that are glaringly missing. . And now its obvious: I need more loved ones in my life, more good friends in my inner circle. Someone near to me.

I am pretty self sufficent and I used to always attract those people that were for lack of a better word, "broken". Those that needed fixing, that needed what I had to offer. I do not want those kind of relationships anymore. I want someone on MY LEVEL. I want friends that do not NEED ME but want to be in my prescence. I am very particular about letting people into my "inner cirle". I want people who have character, heart, strength and joy. Someone who does not need fixing on many levels. How do you make a good anam cara (gaelic for "soul friend") at the age of 44? How do I go about it? BE THE CHANGE YOU WISH TO SEE IN THE WORLD, Ghandi once said. So true.

If I placed a personal ad for a friend it would say:

Wanted: a good friend over 40, loves life, appreciates creativity, liberal minded, understanding but not a pushover, comfortable in her own skin. Willing to see new things in life as opportunities for change. Battles her own fears and shortcomings, sometimes well sometimes not so well. Not perfect, not trying to be perfect but strives to do her best. She is not interested in those who are playing at life, but loving the life she creates. Loves animals. Funny sense of humor, but not mean. Willing to laugh with me, not at me.

This all seems so silly! I can make friends. But I don't want to, really! I want the friends and family that I do have, to live closer! LOL. (Can you hear me whining? LOL.)

Its a subject that has come up for me alot of late. I am ready to tackle it, I think. I can take a painting class again, or a language class (something I keep talking about...), I can join a group, volunteer ----any number of ways of meeting like-minded people. So now I guess I have no more excuses left. I have to "get out there".

This has been made more aware to me, by spending time with my mother in law, when she was healing here and with my sister in law, Susy. I miss the feminine energy around me. It was a hard time, but a very nice time too. It was like an extended "sleep over"!

Well, I will see what develops with this as the new year arrives...


Celtic Artist on 2:48 AM said...

You are pretty well written. Celtic Tattoo