I don't really know if thin people can understand this. I think that only heavy people and handicapped people can understand this next topic.
When one does not fit the norm, in my instance, the norm I speak about is my size, does it make you less visable to people. I say yes. Yes, over weight can make you feel bad about yourself and you choose to "hide". But I don't really do that. I notice how others treat me as invisible. Almost less worthy.
I don't fit a mold of what is beautiful to most. I have even received the embarrassed "avert your eyes" reaction. As if I had two heads. Maybe this is human nature, maybe not. I just find it interesting that when I lose weight people meet my eyes more. They talk to me more. They seem more engaging. I think its sad really. I mean, how many wonderful spirits are out there waiting to be fully engaged in life, but we don't give them a second thought because of the way they look?
I have a wide view of what is beautiful. I am an artist. I can see beauty in pain, and darkness and in people who do not fit a certain type. I feel lucky that way. I am not defined by someone esle's narrowness of what beautiful is.
Maybe when I lose the weight, folks will SEE me and lISTEN to me when I speak of this. And I will speak of it. I promise.
The Current and Sassy Me
My Story
November 22, 2005, I had a gastric bypass surgery called the Mini Gastric Bypass. I weighed 292 pounds. (My highest weight was 311 pounds.) I had struggled with the idea of surgery until I read the facts: that the percentage of people who had over 100 pounds to lose that lost it, and kept it off was nil. I was slowly dying.
I lost 147 pounds and my life has changed in so many ways. I am the person I was meant to be. Recently, I started to forget where I came from and lost track and gained some weight back. But like the Phoenix, I rise from the ashes and renew myself. The Warrior returns. Join me as I battle this war, and win.
If I can do this, so can you!
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